Mother Base
by Lordoftheghostking28
Summary: Big Boss/Snake's adventures at Mother Base. Lots of random things happen. Lots of random people join. The kitchen blows up. This is a birthday present for my bro. M to be safe.


**Mother Base**

**XxXxXxXx**

** Rated M to be safe. Swearing, violence stuff, and suggestive themes near the end.**

**This story dedicated to mah bro, who turns 13 today! Hurray!**

**This is basically a story about Mother Base in MG: Peacewalker. It is filled with happiness, and some characters I threw in. I own nothing.**

** XxXxXxXx**

Snake, or Big Boss, was walking down the Base's main hallway with that one guy named Kaz. It was a small structure, but it would do. Maybe the people crammed into it would eventually get smart and build more room. But that would require brains.

"Ok, Snake. We need people extracted with Fulton Recovery. They get sent back here and begin work." said Kaz. "The more the merrier. So get out there. Oh, by the way, I've confiscated your grenades and C4. There have been too many deaths recently."

Snake grumbled something to himself and sat in the hallway against the wall. He pulled out a bag of chips and a cigar.

"What are you waiting for?" Kaz asked.

"I'm hungry. I haven't eaten in days." Snake stuffed chips into his mouth. "And it doesn't help that this bag is mostly air."

"Oh. Well, when you're done, get out there."

Snake didn't reply. He continued munching.

"Tell you what. I'll give you the grenades back." Kaz said.

"I'm on it."

** XxXxXxXx**

After dislodging at least twenty bullets from his arms and torso, Snake went to face the nine new recruits in the Base. They were all young men in their early thirties, strong too, by the looks of it. The Base would hopefully be in good hands.

"All right, listen up." Snake said.

The men all snapped to attention. "Yes, Boss?"

"Don't call me Boss." Snake sighed. "This is Mother Base. You will be assigned to one of five categories. Combat, R&D, the mess hall, medical duty, or the intelligence corps."

"Yes, Boss!" the recruits said.

"Don't call me Boss. There is also a brig. If you show shady behavior, you will be dispatched there. The sick bay is also available for anything. Am I clear?"

"Yes, Boss!"

"Don't call me Boss!" Snake hissed.

"Yes, B..." the recruits shut up.

"That's better. Clearly none of you are fit for the intelligence corps." Snake sighed. "You there! What's your name?"

"Lobster!" a man with red hair said.

"You're assigned to combat."

"Yes, B...Sir! Yes, Sir!" Lobster shuffled out of the room.

"You! What's your name?"

"Penguin!"

"Penguin? What kind of a name...nevermind. You're assigned to R&D."

"Yes, sir!"

"Starfish reporting for duty!" a man saluted.

"Allright...Medical bay." Snake said as he shuffled off. He began sorting through the rest of the men until only one was left.

"And who are you?"

"Uh, Raiden, Sir!" a nervous looking kid said.

"How old are you, Raiden?" Snake asked.

"I'm twenty, Sir!"

"That's a little young for a soldier, isn't it?"

Raiden shrugged. "I...I'm a good soldier, Sir."

"Are you? Good. Combat unit." Snake turned to leave.

"Th...thank you, Sir."

"Don't mention it, kid."

**XxXxXxXx**

"Dammit Kaz. Can I have my C4 back yet?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because you obliterated an entire village."

"It was hiding too many soldiers!"

"Soldiers you could have recruited."

"..."

"Report back to Base, Snake."

"Fine." Snake used a Fulton Recovery balloon and shot into the air. He made it back to the base to find the place noticeably cleaner than when he had left. "Hey...is it just me, or...?"

"As it turns out, Lobster has OCD." Kaz said. "He's been cleaning nonstop."

"Well, good for him." Snake said. "And everyone else?"

"All working. Although we're running a bit short of mess hall staff. See if you can pick up more recruits next time you head out."

"I'll try." Snake said.

"Oh, and Penguin wanted you to have this." Kaz handed him another Fulton balloon. "He's upped how many you can carry singlehandedly."

"Remind me to give him a raise."

Kaz grinned and slapped him on the back. "So far, you're doing a good job, Boss."

"Don't call me Boss."

"Well, then, get out there and save more people!"

** XxXxXxXx**

Snake managed to rescue three POWs and seven other soldiers. They were waiting in the Mother Base's main room, looking confused and bored. Snake gave them all the pep talk and divided them into sections. Things were going smoothly.

"Hey...hey, Snake..." Kaz said, nudging him with an elbow. "I heard there's some girls out there somewhere. You should get them."

"This place could use a woman's touch." Snake nodded. "I'll see what I can do."

"Yes!" Kaz cheered. Snake rolled his eyes and headed out.

** XxXxXxXx **

**THREE RATION PACKS, NINETEEN TRANQUILIZER DARTS, AND FIVE GRENADES LATER...**

** XxXxXxXx**

"Ladies, welcome to Mother Base." Snake said, motioning around the main room. "I'm Snake. And who might you be?"

"Earthworm. Call me Earth." said a blonde woman.

"I'm Rose..." said another with straight dark hair.

"And I'm Robin." the final recruit said.

"Are all of you alright with medical bay?" Snake asked.

"Yeah." Robin answered for the other two.

"Good. I'm sure the men here will be delighted to meet you." Snake turned and left, nearly running into Raiden outside the door. "Dammit, Raiden! Watch where you're going!"

"Sorry...Sir...uh...There's something happening... Lobster's going crazy!"

Snake drew his tranquilizer from his belt. "I'll check it out."

The combat room was barricaded from the inside. Snake rammed his elbow against it until it opened. He and Raiden ran into the room, searching for the crazed crewman.

"Lobster...?" Raiden called. His small pistol shook in his hands. "I don't want to shoot you..."

A bullet shot nearby Snake's head, making him spin around and aim at the patch of red hair taking shelter behind a desk. "Stop fooling around. Surrender or I will open fire."

Lobster let out a war cry and jumped from behind the desk, firing wildly. Snake ducked and rolled while Raiden threw himself out of the way, landing on his arm and hitting part of the destroyed barricade. Big Boss shot twice with the tranquilizer, knocking Lobster to the ground.

Snake stood. "You alright, Raiden?"

"I'm fine...I just landed on my arm..."

"Take Lobster to the brig. I'll get Kaz to question him." Snake headed out.

** XxXxXxXx **

The rescuing was going pretty smoothly. Another lady was added to the Base, and a few of the men were keen to win her over. One built her a tiny robot that squeaked, "Will you go out with me?"

Aside from that, things were going well.

"Hey, Boss!" Kaz ran up to Snake.

"How many times do I have to tell you? Don't call me Boss!" Snake growled.

"Sorry, Boss! Anyway, I figured out why Lobster went insane!"

Snake facepalmed. "Why?"

"He was sort of overwhelmed by the state of this place. But since it's gotten better, he's improved. He's in sickbay right now."

"Good. Keep him there for observation," Snake said.

"One more thing, Boss..." Kaz lowered his voice.

"What?" Snake spat. "I told you, don't call me B—"

"Raiden is the worst soldier I've ever seen."

Snake chuckled. "Really? He can't be that bad."

"He managed to destroy half the kitchen with a misfired RPG."

"...Oh..." Snake swore under his breath. "Is that why we've been living off of Ramen Noodles for the past four days?"

"Yeah...we've got people rebuilding. That Robin is quite a workaholic. And she wears yoga shorts~!"

Snake rolled his eyes and pushed Kaz out of the way. "I'll report back here when I've got more recruits."

**XxXxXxXx**

"Quickly! Get her to sickbay!" Snake commanded.

"Oh, don't be an _idiota, Serpente_." the girl on a stretcher grumbled. "I can walk."

"Dammit, Amanda, you're going to kill yourself."

Amanda grumbled Spanish curses. "Fine. I'll report to sickbay." she tried to get up.

"No! Not like that!" Snake hissed.

Two guys walked over and picked up the ends of the stretcher and carried her off. Snake breathed a sigh of relief. "That could have gone worse..."

"Will she be ok?" a short kid next to him asked.

"She'll be fine, Chico." Snake said. "But for now, how would you like to be in charge of the intelligence unit? You're the only one around here with common sense."

"Oh boy!" Chico ran off. Raiden came running up to Snake as the kid darted off.

"Reporting for duty, Sir!"

"You're late. They're already carrying Amanda off to sickbay."

"Oh," Raiden looked disappointed. "Is...is there anything else I can do?"

"No." Snake said, recalling the exploded kitchen.

"I can go on a mission! Rescue some people! That'll save you some time, too!" Raiden said.

"Are you sure about that?" Snake asked flatly.

"Yeah!"

"Are you really sure?"

"Yeah...!"

"Really?" Snake glared.

"Um...yeah...!"

"Remember the kitchen? How did you even pull that off, anyway? I'm not sending you out into the field of battle so inexperienced."

"The kitchen was an accident," Raiden muttered.

"Uh huh. Go clean something and report back to me when we're eating steaks and potatoes again instead of instant pasta."

Raiden shuffled off, looking extremely let down. There was a soft thump sound coming from down the hallway. It was pretty constant, followed by soft gasping.

Snake peeked around a corner and muttered, "Dammit, Amanda."

"Sickbay is boring. Assign me to combat." she leaned on her crutches. "And I request a wheelchair, Boss."

"Don't call me Boss."

** XxXxXxXx**

Snake was pretty sure he had uttered the phrase, "Dammit, Amanda" at least fifteen times that day. He said it the sixteenth time as he caught her sneaking out a window toward the combat unit.

"I cannot stay in sickbay like this!" she protested as Snake picked her up and threw her over his shoulder. He walked calmly back to sickbay, ignoring the odd looks he was cast as Amanda beat his back and shouted curses. "_Està muy terrible! Muy terrible_!"

Snake dumped her on a sickbay bed and left.

"That was pretty funny." Kaz was waiting for him.

"Shut up." Snake growled.

"Anyway, Boss...I found some POWs that need to be extracted. I figured I'll send one of the combat guys on it, as it seems pretty easy. Anyone I should send?"

"Anyone but Raiden. And keep him away from the RPGs. And swords. And stun rods. And basically anything lethal. And don't call me Boss." Snake said.

"Right. Consider those POWs rescued!" Kaz ran off.

"_MUY TERRIBLE_!" Amanda reminded Snake again from sickbay.

** XxXxXxXx **

Snake was enjoying a quiet afternoon in his quarters. He planned on reading a book and writing a report. But screw that, he was tired.

"BOSS! WE HAVE A SITUATION!" Kaz screamed, bursting into the room.

"What...?!" Snake fell out of his bed. "Don't call me Boss! What do you want?"

"There's a little problem...well, a big problem." Kaz stammered. "Um...I dispatched Dragon to rescue the POWs...and it seems Raiden went with him."

"Dammit, Raiden..." Snake sighed.

"Dragon is back with three POWs...and one wounded soldier."

Snake growled curses and got up. "Is he still alive?"

"Yeah. He's in sickbay."

Snake ran out of the room and down the hall, scooping Amanda up again as she tried to make a break for it. He and Kaz ran to sickbay.

"Hi, Boss...Raiden will live." Rose reported.

"Don't call me Boss. And good work." Snake set Amanda down and ignored her death glares.

Raiden was propped up by pillows, but he was conscious. He had a strange look on his face.

"I hope you learned something today." Snake sighed.

"Yeah. I did." Raiden focused on something and blinked. "I learned that love exists at first sight."

Snake followed his gaze to Rose's backside as she bent over to pick something up. Raiden sighed happily. Snake rolled his eyes. "I meant about the suicide mission you set yourself on."

"What...? Oh yeah. That thing. I won't do it again." Raiden grinned stupidly.

Snake managed to refrain from throwing up and caught Rose's attention. "You're assigned to R&D until further notice."

"Alright. I can do that." Rose walked out.

The look on Raiden's face was priceless.

**XxXxXxXx**

Another group of POWs and soldiers arrived the next day as another plant was added to the Mother Base. Snake nodded at Dragon as he heroically left the room on another successful mission. A pep talk was given, seeming incredibly repetitive. Everyone was assigned a place.

"Excuse me, Big Boss...what about me?" asked a voice.

Snake turned around to see someone he didn't expect to see. "EVA...!"

"Yep." EVA said.

Snake stared at her.

"My eyes are up here, Boss." EVA said.

"Don't call me...anyway, how did you end up here?" Snake asked.

"You know. Stuff."

"Uh huh."

"Stop staring at my boobs."

"Why...?"

That was about when there was a thunk in the hall Snake growled something and looked away from EVA. "DAMMIT, AMANDA!"

The escape artist turned and limped away, screaming, "YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!"

EVA rolled her eyes. "It seems like you have this place under control."

"I do. AMANDA, GO BACK TO SICKBAY!" Snake pursued her.

"OVER MY DEAD BODY!"

Meanwhile, in sickbay, Raiden sat, looking sad. He missed his Rose.

**XxXxXxXx**

**The glorious end! I hope you enjoyed! The Peacewalker bosses are driving me insane. I have the XBox 360 remastered version/collection, and I unlocked an achievement called 'You failed again, didn't you?' for getting 50+ game overs.**

** Talk about discouraging. :,C **

**Anyway, remember to review!**

** Hasta la Vista, Readers!**

** Lordoftheghostking28**

**PS: Happy Birthday, bro. This is your present. Merry new Hanukkah. **


End file.
